Children, yes or no…

I for think that everyone should be able to experience the joys of having a child whether it is from natural childbirth between two loving people or agreed upon adoption. Though I do not believe that everyone should have a child of their own since some people are not capable of properly taking care of a child. If a loving couple is to have a child they need to be responsible parents and take care of the child in the proper loving way parents should.

As a bi-sexual man I have had issues with wanting to father children of my own. I love kids and would love to be able to father a child or two of my own. I do not think it will happen unless I can find that one special person where she would accept me for whom I am and her family to share the same love and acceptance. This one special person would want to be with me and create a happy family of our own. The way this world looks down upon gay people as parents hurts my chances of this becoming a reality.

There have been times in my life where I have broken down and cried as I have watched other people with their children. An example of this is that one night my parents, my brother, his wife, their two children (one a new born) and I were sitting and talking at a restaurant. My father held my new niece (my second God Daughter) and he was so proud. My mother was smiling for she was once again a Grandmother. I sat there watching and almost lost it as I was fighting back the tears that were ready to flow from my eyes. I realized at that moment that I would never be able to give my parents that joy, the moment of being Grandparents with a child of my own. This was before I came out as a bi-sexual man. My parents had no idea at the time that it would be highly unlikely for them to ever have a grandchild from me.
This type of situation has happened on more than one occasion in my life.

Every time my parents get to see any of my nieces or nephews it is always the same scene. My parents grab and hug the kids and are just so happy to see them. It is like a knife that stabs me every time I witness this. This might be one of the reasons why I do not like family gatherings. I get depressed. Then again I guess that is why I make such a great uncle. I love my nieces and nephews. Right now they are the closest I will ever get to children of my own.

Whenever I am out I tend to look at couples with a baby. I know that I would make a wonderful father. I would love to father a child of my own. Not only to be a dad but also for my parents so they could have a grandchild from me. I believe that family is the single most important factor in life next to happiness. Like I said unless I find that one special person who would accept me for whom I am. I will most likely go through life alone and childless, that is why I have animals to take care of and love. They are my children.

So yes, I would love to be able to father a child or two of my own to love as their father.